Footprints in the Sand

Since I have had to do crazy stuff recently, aka withdraw from my first class ever and having to petition to keep my scholarship along with catching up in my Nutrition class before the term ends in 2 weeks, I have had an abnormal amount of time to sit back and reflect. Reflecting can be good, but also due to what has happened recently it can be bad too. I think I am finally getting through the shock stage of everything that has happened and I think it is kind of starting to hit me. Which is hard. I almost wish I could stay in the shock mode/military mode where I try to just fill every second of my day so that I have no time to think/break down.

But through all of this, I have learned to lean on my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ even more. I feel bad that I feel like I need them in my life more than ever right now, but boy do I. I don’t even know if I could function if it wasn’t for the support I have received through Them. It reminds me of a poem that I have heard time and time again, and was even recited at my grandpa’s funeral. It is called “Footprints in the Sand” and I truly love it so here it is:

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there was one only.
This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from anguish,
sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints,
so I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life
there has only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”
The Lord replied,
“The years when you have seen only one set of footprints,
my child, is when I carried you.”

Believe

I believe in pink.  I believe laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girl's are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day, and I believe in miracles. 
-Audrey Hepborn


LOVE this quote so I felt like sharing it with everyone. I, too, believe in being strong when everything is going wrong, in miracles, in pink, in being happy. All we have to do is believe and life can become so much better! Just remember to smile when everything is going wrong because as Mother Teresa said, "Peace begins with a smile."

“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.”

You know how they always say that God only gives you trials that you can handle? Well my family must be super strong!! Three grandparents gone in 1 week. Ya, that is what I call a rough week. A week full of roller coaster emotions, lack of sleep and physical exhaustion from all of the stress. My emotions are so unpredictable. Sometimes I will just see something small that reminds me of my grandparents and just break down. Walking through Wal-Mart and crying is not normally acceptable so it is kind of hard because I feel the need to hold in my grief a lot of the time. But it literally hurts inside, like someone punched the wind out of me. But my family must be pretty strong because we continue to work hard together. Though my family all should really not be together (since it is practically three families put together), and at times it seems that it is going to fall apart, we are all still together. I have a great family. I am so thankful that I have them in my life and that I continue to have them watching over me, both here on earth and those that have passed watching me in heaven.

Grandpa was my best friend. He always was watching over me, and continues to do so. 

"One of the best ways to have a little heaven in your home is to have someone you love in heaven"

Life.

Today is one of those days that you just wonder, why me? Good thing I have the Gospel in my life. Not only did I have to make it through my grandma's funeral (such a hard, hard funeral but also uplifting), but once we got out of the funeral we found out that my grandma in Canada passed away today too. And grandpa got put on a machine to help him breathe in the hospital and has an infection. I just feel like everything came down at once. My brain is having a hard time comprehending it. It is almost like I don't know if my heart can take any more trials and heartaches. I just hurt. I can't wait until I feel happy again. I almost feel like I should be happier because I do know the truth if the Gospel, but it is just a hard time. I am so glad that I can be with the family and know that they are going through the same thing as me. Family is the best thing ever at times like these. Thank heavens for family and God bless this great family that I have been blessed to.

"A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life." - Charles Darwin

My friend posted this as a status the other day and I really liked, especially lately and what I have been going through. It said:


Make sure your cheeks always hurt more than your heart.

Awkward: (adjective) lacking social graces or manners

You know those times when you just can’t help but laugh at the awkward situations you are in? One of my best friends, Rachel, came and visited me yesterday for a tiny bit. It was so much fun. We were laughing about some of the things we had done together when we were living together. It was so awkward when we were talking about some stuff and then someone would walk in the room. For example, we were talking about the time(s) we made laxative “goodies” such as brownies and “chocolate” covered pretzels for our roommates. We were talking about buying tons of laxatives when my current roommate walked in the room, just in time to hear about all the laxatives we needed to buy. Just for clarification, we do NOT have bowel troubles. But it was funny just to see the confused and awkward faces of those that overheard our conversations yesterday. It was just so great. My old apartment of roommates and I thrived on awkward situations. We lived for them. They weren’t awkward for us, but we loved making other people feel uncomfortable. It was SO great. So here is my post dedicated to my awkward life. May it continue and may I continue to enjoy it.

The Little Things

This weekend I am down in Vegas because of the 4th of July weekend. I get a little break from school and I am ecstatic. It is so nice to just take a quick breather before getting back down to business. School is going splendid, don't get me wrong, BUT a break is always nice. Since I got home, I have realized a lot of the little things I have missed about home.

I miss home made meals. I miss my dad buying treats for you (it is part of the way he shows love). Having my little brother fall asleep on my bed and having to tell him to go to his own bed. Funny family conversation. That feeling that you know you aren't getting judged because your family knows everything about you. Listening to church music Sunday morning before church. Tackling and tickling my little brothers. Swimming. Sun. Those long summer days where you literally live in your swimsuit all day. BBQs. When you roll down the window when getting in your car to let cool air in, only to find out the air outside the car is actually hotter than the air inside. Searching a parking lot to try and park next to a tiny tree so your car can be in as much shade as possible. Police, not just there to give out tickets but doing something exciting such as protecting you. The moment when you drive into the Vegas Valley at approximately mile marker 60 and you see the valley and your breath is literally taken away (still, after living in Vegas all my life, I still am awestruck at the beauty of Las Vegas at night). Having my parents to say, hug and kiss goodnight to every night. A family to go to church with. There are so many little things in life that we take for granted and these are just a few of them. I am so thankful for this country and those that died to protect it. Let us not take our great freedoms for granted. Remember the little (and big) things in life. We are so blessed and may we continue to be. God Bless America!

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." - Robert Brault